Why ‘Indian Values’ Prohibit Girls from Wearing Short Dresses

No Cleavage Please

Aunty Scolds Young Girls for Short Dress

The debate around women’s short dress in public never seems to end. This has been raging ever since I was young and in recent times it goes even more outrageous. Recently, an aunty just refueled this debate by scolding two young girls (strangers) for wearing short dresses. Allegedly, she said, something that the short dress instigates men to rape women. These girls later followed her to a mall, took her video where they were found repeatedly demanding an apology from her. Another scantily dressed woman shopper who claimed to be a mother of a daughter, joined them in bashing the aunty against her alleged remark about girls’ short dress and said, even if her daughter walked in public in swimming costume, no one had the ‘right’ to say anything to her. It was her choice. She also added that as a woman the aunty should have supported women in wearing short dress.

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This article is a part of the series ‘Vedic India’ where I discuss controversial traditional Indian and Vedic culture and explain why the tradition was like that. Many of those traditions are viewed today as oppressive towards women and against their personal freedom of expression.

Check out all articles under Vedic India Here

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‘Short Dress’ and Gender Justice

I remember that sometime ago in a Workdhop (yes, not workshop, ‘Dhop’ is a Bengali slang meaning lie. I call these Workdhop as these are organized to spread feminist lies) on Gender Justice in IIT Kharagpur’s Law School, a feminist professor raised this topic immediately after she entered the class, to show us how much women were oppressed and how their freedom was trampled by patriarchy. She said, “you might have seen how people make comments about women’s dress and how girls can’t wear short dresses in public”, as if wearing revealing clothes is the greatest achievement women can have.

The feminist audience consisting of law students, law professors, practicing advocates, sociologists, social workers and feminist activists nodded in unison. So, I had to raise that at least three girls in that class were wearing short pants and at least five women were wearing sleeveless dresses whereas none of the males in the class were wearing anything short or sleeveless. It was needless to mention that all males in the class were wearing shoes that covered their toes completely and almost none of the women were wearing shoes covering their toes. I had to show her the mirror of the lies she wanted to spread whereas today the situation is just the reverse. No matter where you go, you will find more women in revealing dresses compared to men. Even in courts men are supposed to dress in a certain way, and women’s dress are not critically noticed. In fact, in that class other than me, all other males were wearing full-sleeve clothes. I was wearing a ‘sexist’ pink Tee which was half-sleeve one.

So, in the end I asked the feminists when they will teach our children to be responsible and dress responsibly rather than consider everything as ‘right’ and brainwash them in the educational institutions as oppressed. I raised, When will women be responsible citizens? Obviously, the feminist crowd was not happy with my comments, but they were not able to refute my claims as I have proved that instantly in the class. Feminists often go away by spreading one-sided sexism, I just told them (in their den) that is not allowed anymore.

gender-justice-debate-iitkgp
The author is debating various Gender Justice topics with a group of feminists (students, faculty, social workers, activists, research scholars and practicing lawyers) in a feminist workdhop on Gender Justice in IIT Kharagpur’s Law School. The other half engaged in the debate is not shown here.

If you are working in any HR, Marketing, Media or IT company you will find the same especially on Fridays and weekends. When only a handful of companies like Microsoft may be allowing men to come to office in shorts, women wearing short dresses even on normal weekdays is not rare. However, we don’t see such controversies arising often.

Short Dress – Why Target Women?

But the point is, even if we understand that women wear more short dresses than men in public all controversies around short dresses are levelled against women not against men. In my lifetime I have not seen any single controversy around short dresses a man would have worn but have definitely seen a few controversies around women’s short dresses like the latest one.

While feminists term this as women’s oppression and infringement of their personal freedom of expression, I differ on that point as our personal freedom of expression is not absolute. There are boundaries around that. I have already explained that earlier in THIS article.

Point is, how much short should be considered as short and what is the guarantee that the onlookers can even be judgmental (in a correct way) about what is really ‘short’. Even if we mean ‘vulgar’ when we protest against those ‘short’ dresses, how can a third person decide on what is vulgar and what is not? These are normally driven by one’s value system that can differ, and hence why should these be even given importance.

So, the whole point is about existing social norms of dressing. Some dresses can be absolutely fine in some places and certain dresses are not. For instance, when I kept my sunglass hanging from my shirt pocket in a courtroom, the bench clerk scolded me for keeping the sunglass out and ‘ordered’ me to keep that inside my bag. Whereas in the same court, when a woman came in sleeveless blouse and kept her sunglasses on her head, she was not told anything by the same bench clerk.

So, clearly women enjoy a lot of leeway in ALL situations and they take it as their ‘right’. The reason why women are targeted and are told about responsible dressing most of the time is that many of them have no sense of acceptable public behavior and they think they can shout it out everywhere to win. This so-called patriarchy ‘oppresses’ men by being biased against them despite men are the more responsible sex in these matters, but these never become issue.

So, we understand that even though both sexes are targeted for their social behavior, it only becomes known to all when a woman is told to behave in public. When women are the most errant lot, it is natural that they are ‘told’ by the society to behave responsibly more than the men.

Why Do We Dress?

Gone are the days when we dressed only to save ourselves from harsh weather conditions. Today, we dress to ‘kill’. Well, that means today dressing is a method to impress others and mainly the opposite ‘gender’. The way we dress and wear accessories that adds to our overall persona and drives how others treat us. That is the same reason we see despite being males, gay people dress differently than heterosexual people. We identify ourselves with our dress. Added to that is the brands we wear.

Today’s metrosexual youth wants to explore their full potential. That includes their sexual potential if they are in that group. Also, there is no hindrance if aged people want to remain ‘sexy’. Remaining sexy even after ageing is a great compliment for anyone. The dress we use in a way adds to our ‘sexiness’ and makes us look younger. (Exceptions are Yogis. There are Women who find Baba Ramdev extremely sexy despite his asexual dressing. You know yogis bring extra oomph factor that we normal guys can’t).

So, public dressing is not for only personal comfort but to represent one to others, to the society. Women, especially those who want to show them as sexy thus can’t wear asexual dressing (like a burqa or all covered dress) if they want to portray them sexy. They need to dress certain way to show that sexiness to attract males.

Now feminists may shout out loud that, “I dress for myself and not for other men” but the reality is they always crave for attention as is obvious from they shooting the video of the aunty and making that viral. This behavior showed they wanted attention on social media. Also, you might have observed that it is the feminists who take out nude/semi-nude rallies worldwide including in India. You will not see MRAs doing that. I will also prove with scientific evidence that women wear revealing outfits to attract men, but before we understand our dressing fundamentals, we need to understand an important point, impact of visual cues to men and male sexuality.

Visual Cues & Male Sexuality

Men are turned on more by visual cues and this is proved by many independent scientists and there is no room for any debate. However, I will still prove it here for those who say these ‘theories’ can be debated. No, they can’t be, there is no room for any debate here.

To understand this, first we need to see this simple brain scan experiment that scientists have conducted.

Even though this is done on addicts and specifically porn addicts to understand how their brain reacts to a stimulus (porn images); this experiment will help us understand how to check our brain activities for visual cues.

In this video, you will see Dr Valerie Voon of Cambridge University doing MRI scan to find out brain activities while they watch pornography. For porn addicts, the Ventral Striatum or the reward centre showed an exaggerated response just like other addicts to drugs or alcohol. So, we understand when someone is getting stimulated for pleasure, their brains become more active in their Ventral Striatum.

This principle is widely used in medical science today to understand response to different conditions to understand the differences in sexual drives in men and women. In another similar experiment, some doctors did a brain scan of men and women and subjected them to different sexually explicit images (this video could not be shared here as this is proprietary video of Discovery and not available on YT). It was noticed that men respond more to visual sexual cues but women don’t. Rather women’s response to visual sexual cues are so complex that these can’t be categorized as sexual stimuli.

In another video, Dennis Prager, who established the PragerU, has explained logically and with credible, non-refutable evidence that visual cues are strongest for men –

So, you understand that it is already proved beyond reasonable doubt that males are aroused more from visual sexual cues and these visual cues are the main factors that lead to men’s decision on selecting sexual partners.

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This article is a part of the series ‘Vedic India’ where I discuss controversial traditional Indian and Vedic culture and explain why the tradition was like that. Many of those traditions are viewed today as oppressive towards women and against their personal freedom of expression.

Check out all articles under Vedic India Here

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Where is Our Focus?

Now it is important to understand where our focus lies when we see a person. There was an experiment done on that as well, check it out to understand –

So, men looking at women’s breasts and hip area is perfectly normal. Both these regions give them signals about the woman’s sexual behavior or sexual attractiveness and that is why when women want to sexually attract men to them, they wear revealing dresses, expose breasts, butt and show how sexy they are.

To understand different flirtation techniques women use and what scientists have found from experiments, see this video –

Even though the video is not complete and human sexuality is rather complex subject and Discovery has a dedicated series running for a few hours on this topic, male sexuality is mostly ignited from visual cues and women are very much aware of that. Not only that, women use these visual cues to attract men towards them.

Testosterone Drive – No, It’s Not Only a Male Problem

Women very often claim that if their short dresses ignite men’s passion, then it’s men’s problem, not women’s. Feminist point is men need to behave and not expect women to behave.

Since the above point is more for logical argument and not for any scientific evidence, I will only give logical explanation why men’s testosterone drive is also a problem of women and should be handled as a social phenomenon and not pertaining only to individuals.

Today, if we look around any problem women face, that becomes a social problem and the society takes the pledge to take the burden of it to solve it. For instance, the various diseases women suffer from in their puberty or later in life becomes a social issue where the entire society pays tax to solve those. If a woman is suffering from sexual overdrive and lures many men to bed and rapes them, the woman is treated with compassion for her psychological disorder instead of being treated as a rapist. Whole society also stands up to solve women’s problem of being anemic or suffering from breast cancer.

In terms of sexual abuse, when a woman is teased sexually the whole society stands up to protest. However, when it’s proved beyond reasonable doubt that women wearing short dresses is actually to tease men sexually, it becomes oppressive if someone tells them to behave (dress properly) in public. A mother openly telling that her daughter can wear a swimming consume in the streets and that should be fine another example of insensible behavior.

What if a man masturbates in public by looking at a woman? Why is that considered as a sexual harassment of the woman? Remember a recent case in Kolkata where a man was found to be masturbating in a bus? He didn’t do anything to the woman who shot his video but still police arrested him with great efficiency and then he suffered all losses. I am not saying that such behavior by males is acceptable, it is not, but why then women dressing in sexually explicit manner that is intended to sexually attract men are not punished?

Our Public Behavior is A Social Issue

From the example of a man masturbating in a bus you can understand that our public behavior is a social problem and the entire society needs to deal with that. Like in the Kolkata case, public did express their anger over social media but mostly as it was sexual abuse of the girl who shot the video without any provocation. That man didn’t do anything to the girl and it was the girl who took the video without the consent of the man. If the genders were reversed, immediately the man would have been punished for shooting such a video without the consent of the girl.

So, we understand that there exists a huge double standard in this society where we are highly selective towards our social justice system. The gender justice problems that feminists talk about doesn’t exist. In fact, the bias exists against men. If we do not prohibit women from sexually exploiting men every day, then we are creating another daily menace in the society.

Revealing Dresses and Rape

Now the question is simply because a girl is wearing a revealing dress, does that mean she should be raped? Feminists always distort social restrictions on girls’ dress like this. I remember, that a feminist male comedian has mocked this in one of his shows. He told that even when he saw a scantily clad woman he did get attracted to her, but that didn’t mean that he should rape her. He would try to flirt and woo her and slowly, eventually if things go well, they will advance.

Even though he explained the expected male behavior well, we can see that his ultimate motive of flirting with the woman was to have sex with her.

The question is, whether everyone around us is so educated and well-behaved and can we expect this from everyone around in this hyper-sexualized world? The answer is a clear ‘No’. Even though this is the expected behavior, but reality may be far from this.

Hence the caution to women is only to protect them as the lawmakers and police can’t reach every corner of the nation and our value system is rotten enough to create unwanted situations.

Why Tradition Prohibited Bodily Displays

Now that we understand nuances of the issue of women’s revealing clothes and bodily displays, we need to understand why traditional India prohibited females from showing their body and why Indian women were draped only in a sari around (like an asexual dress) not to exaggerate any body part. It was not only for their well-being (yes, I do find this anti-male as it shows men as potential rapists) it was for an overall social good as well, as I shall explain now.

Rabindranath Tagore once said – “মানুষ হওয়া সহজ কিন্তু মানুষ হওয়া সহজ নয় !” (It’s easy to be a human but not easy to be a human being). That meant, one can take birth as a human or in a human form but it takes really hard work to be a real human being. A human here is the animal in human form but a human being is a human with other human values attached to him. One needs to work hard to acquire these values in life to become a real human being.

According to Indian philosophy a child born as a human is the little animal who needs to learn consistently to acquire higher levels of human life through a disciplined acquiring of human traits. Traditionally, men were asked to learn Shastras or Dharma (even learning about one’s trade was his dharma – responsibility) and women were asked to learn household work and follow the path of their husband (that was stree-dharma).

This philosophy taught us that animals remain as animals because they can’t think like human beings and they are driven more by the natural instincts (like sex). So, the only goal in an animal’s life is to have sex, produce offspring and live. However, the goal of humans is not that. Even though producing offsprings may be one of the many goals in life, but even their Garhasthya life was not driven solely by sex. Men’s dharma was to protect and provide for their dependents. Indiscriminate sex or sexually driven acts were prohibited to elevate the mankind from animalhood to the human hood. This process needed to follow through all generations to keep the humans the most advanced species on the earth and to prohibit them from becoming animals again.

However, a question may arise that it was the traditional India that had extreme sexual acts crafted on temples. If the tradition really wanted to take the human race away from animalistic nature driven by and centered around sex, then why were those curvature made in public places like temples?

The explanation is provided here –

Land of Kamasutra but Lovemaking in Public is Prohibited, Why?

The Effect of Sexual Exhibition

I will end this discussion by showing the effects of over exhibition of the sexual power that women possess. Today, the urge of looking sexy is so much that it takes precedence over every other human value. So, an over qualified woman who may be a good human being but looks average is not valued in life. The outer shine created by sexy dresses, costly make-ups take away women’s real value and reduce them to their sexual self. When that sexual worth is over their value is also over. But women who are learning through their life only about their sexual worth, do not or can not do anything about it when they are aged.

I have seen extremely unattractive (physically only) women wearing short dresses even in their ‘40s trying to attract men. These women exploit men in their youth and do not find any suitable partner and so they keep on looking even when their sexual power is gone. But by then they are reduce to a flesh without any value. This happens because women themselves have outpriced themselves in this society by over-pricing their sexual worth through all forms of sexual overdrives. Also, unattractive women in their ‘20s and ‘30s don’t get any potential mate as no one finds them attractive enough to marry. When we center our society around sex this is how both sexes suffer. This is the reason women should only display their sexual powers sparingly. Too many choices are good enough to spoil any of us.

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This article is a part of the series ‘Vedic India’ where I discuss controversial traditional Indian and Vedic culture and explain why the tradition was like that. Many of those traditions are viewed today as oppressive towards women and against their personal freedom of expression.

Check out all articles under Vedic India Here

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Next in this series – Why Shrimat Bhagavad Geeta Prohibited Sexual Addiction

 

 

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12 comments

  1. I haven’t read this article fully… But I am pretty sure men wearing short dresses to office is not controversial because men rarely do it due to fear of rules and other men instigated by feminists and women to bash them verbally and even being threatened to be thrown out of office.

    I have done that successfully in American Express for over 5 months but only got courage as I had read their dress code policy which allowed this and I had made up my decision to leave the company.

    But still I found it annoying first, then amusing and then encouraging to see women pushing men to ask me question about my shorts (formal shorts) and shoes worn without socks.

    One women I clearly heard saying what the fcuk when she was herself violating dress code policy.

    My Director threatened me in a veiled way saying that he would have to ask me to leave when I revealed my plans to come to office in shorts. I told him he will not do that as I have understood the policy better than him. And he quipped that yeah! He cannot even ask women to leave who violate the dress code policy by even wearing revealing clothes that reveal their panties in office.

    And trust me this has happened there. In one instance women laughed at another women without directly naming her for her weird dress, and she walked across the floor to confront those women.

    Also I have seen women getting outraged by men wearing shorts (over weekend and etending their shifts till early Monday morning) even when those men are their friends.

    Women control dress code more than men for both women and men.

    Men after all are happy to see women wearing revealing dresses, but women dislike men dressing freely as per their comforts, the same freedom they want to enjoy.

    For me dress is about comfort more than style statement. So if every office allow, I will wear shorts (not sports or basket ball shorts) and running shoes that can be worn without socks and don’t make feet sweat & smell in summer.

    After all my balls also feel cooler at least by 2-3 degree, which is good for health.

    Like

    • haha..had a good laugh and thanks for commenting and showing the mirror to everyone. Women want to control the dress code policy, they may threaten that a guy’s dress is instigating them sexually but they will not dress responsibly. Like in the recent aunty case, the mother who bashed the aunty saying her daughter can wear swimming costume in public shows the mentality. Women are reducing themselves to sex objects by these means and no wonder why they don’t find long term partners nowadays. When their sexual value is gone, their complete value is gone. This is what feminism has done to women.

      As per men liking women wearing short dresses is also true. Like the male comedian who mocked people like us who promote responsible dressing by saying that even they would get attracted but will behave responsibly. In a way, missing the point that when these male feminists get attracted to females for their sexy dress, very often they are only seeing her as a sex object and nothing else.

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  2. I hear your line of thought about an official dress code, but that’s very different to women wearing short clothes. In an official environment, the company has the right to promote a certain level of dresscode. This applies to different organisations and their inherent rules. However, if you are talking about women wearing short clothes, that is a completely different line of thought. I don’t think it is a fair comparison at all.

    Short clothes or not, it comes all the way down to personal choice of people. End of the day, neither women nor men have the right to police a moral conduct in dress code. It violates all sorts of personal choice. A dress is a person’s individual choice, having a personal or social boundary to it in the name of culture or personal taste takes a wrong precedence. In an organisational set up, it takes a different meaning altogether. The way I see it, they are two very different things..

    Unfortunately, I think this article is extremely biased from a singular perspective. I am not a feminist, but I am afraid there is a certain amount in this which enrages me as well.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Wearing a dress in public is part of our social behavior, so the society has all the right to set boundaries. There is no question of ‘right’ here. If you don’t believe me, try wearing a shorts and a vest and go to a court. You will know. I have given enough evidences from different walks of life to show the imbalance in our thoughts. You have however not given any good reasoning in support of your ‘thought’ why it should be personal choice only. You are just repeating the popular rhetoric that women can wear anything they want. No, they can’t even we men can’t. Also if it is left to one’s personal choice, then it depends on one’s sense of dressing and sense of public behavior as well.

      I have also given an example of a man masturbating in a bus in Kolkata. He didn’t do any harm to the woman who took his video. The woman was seating in front rows of him, but still he was ashamed heavily and later was arrested. I am not saying that is an acceptable behavior, I am only saying like such behavior in public is not acceptable, wearing vulgar dress, unnecessarily exposing oneself to send sexual signals should also not be acceptable.

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      • Again, your examples are ridiculous to the note of it. You are comparing masturbating with dress code. You are talking about dress in court vs dress in public. This is just insane on the note of it. Anyway, I don’t see a point in trying to discuss with you, it will not engage in a constructive conversation.

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        • You don’t see a point because you have no valid point. If we have a ‘right’ to dress anyway in public why not in courts? Think about it. We actually have no right to behave whatever way we want. We only have responsibility. Women dressing irresponsibly in public amounts to their responsibility to public and public behavior. Women trying to sexually seduce men through dressing, is thus a public offence.

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        • 🙂 I very well understand why you still don’t get the logical and scientific explanation of how our sexual attraction works. You are so much brainwashed by feminism that it is impossible for you to grab this. I remember the male comedian who bashed those who believed women’s provocative dress leads to rape. In his show, he asked other guys, “guys, if you see a woman dressed in a sexy manner, what will you do? will you rape her or try to flirt and get close”…there was a roar of laughter there. Everybody understood the point of acceptable public behavior of men, that they are not supposed to get aroused by women’s sexy dress.

          But what they didn’t understand was when they wanted to get close to a woman by seeing her sexy dress, that meant even those male feminists were viewing the woman as a sex object. Even they wanted to have sex (that can be termed as rape later by woman) with the woman. They didn’t find any other value when they selected a woman based on her sex appeal. If that was not the case, why don’t they get attracted to women who are older and asexually dressed?

          We can not change nature. Point here is, when men have loads of responsibility, where are those for women?

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    • Actually I am wondering when will women be more responsible in their behavior? And why is reminding them about their responsibility becomes extremism? When you have no logical explanation, and want every benefit under the sun and get away with you wayward lifestyle, this is what you think. Have you ever thought that even we men are not allowed to dress whatever way we want.

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      • Do you think 2 year olds and 5 year olds are dressing up provocatively to seduce men? If you think women are seducing men, do you think it is alright for men to rape them? Do you think the women you’ve mentioned in your post want to rape Baba Ramdev? Do you think women who are fully covered have never been raped at all? Men like you don’t understand the seriousness of sexual abuse in the society today. As bloggers, we can spread so much of positivity and goodness by writing better posts instead of putting down women like this for satisfying your cheap male ego. Learn what vedic India means first before writing such rubbish on the name of vedic India. Excuse me, you have not reminded women of their responsibility (I don’t think you have the right mind either to do it) but have definitely reminded all of us that unless men like you get daughters and they get sexually abused, you’ll never realise the pain of women who’ve went through it. Your that last para is so disgusting, just shows the cheapness in your being.

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        • Old ill-informed feminist rhetoric. To make you understand this I will write another article some other time. There are other seduction techniques women use. regarding children and old women, they become victims (if at all) because of some other young women in their reproductive age trying these subtle seduction techniques and creating a hyper sexualized environment. So, the weak and vulnerable becomes targets. So, wayward behavior of some women are leading to disaster in some others’ lives. So, our Shastras always prohibited creating and maintaining a hyper-sexualized society. Revealing (exposing in certain ways) clothes is just one component of that.

          This doesn’t mean men’s wayward behavior is acceptable. But not everyone around us is equally educated and behaved. My next article in Vedic India series will deal with why Bhagavad Gita prohibited sexualised society…will have some explanation, however regarding children and old women getting attacked, will be discussed later.

          btw…with 75% rape cases found to be false per NCRB every year, it is only a matter of doubt how many cases involving children and old women are actually true.

          Like

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