If anything that the recent controversy around #BoisLockerRoom has proved, that is rape culture indeed exists and that’s in girls’ minds and fantasy rather than in boys.
A controversy surrounding an Instagram boys’ chat room #BoisLockerRoom and then a so-called ‘boy’ offering another boy to rape/gangrape a girl on Snapchat went viral recently. The secret chat messages leaked from the chat room called #BoisLockerRoom allegedly found boys talking sexual about girls. Many complained that ‘minor’ boys were sharing nudes, morphed photos of minor girls- with the word ‘minor’ was missing from the narratives when used about boys. But even 17-year old girls who gave advice like adults were referred to as minors.
This article is a part of Modern Feminism series. In this series, I discuss different feminist theories and their implications in our life. This series is run in parallel to Vedic India series that tries to understand traditional Indian lifestyle and values.
You can see the entire Modern Feminism series – here
You can see the entire Vedic India series – here
If the screenshots allegedly leaked from BoysLockerRoom were indeed true, those showed boys talking dirty about girls. While the social media became busy bashing the boys for being ‘boys’ and many were challenging the narrative ‘boys will be boys’; another chat room #GirlsLockerRoom was busted. This time the alleged screenshots showed girls talking ‘dirty’ not only about boys but also about gals, homosexuals etc. Girls who took up the feminist crusade against the boy’s locker room were seen objectifying women, talking about their ‘pimple-like breasts’ and ‘awesome back’ of boys. Some were discussing guys’ dick pics.
If you are concerned about the way our teenagers talk nowadays, there was more to come. A Delhi police investigation found that the leaked Snapchat conversation allegedly between two boys suggesting rape/gangrape of a girl was in fact between a girl and a boy. It was also found that contrary to what was initially believed, it was not a boy who wanted to rape/gangrape a girl, but it was, in fact, A GIRL OFFERING HERSELF TO BE RAPED/gangraped. ALSO, IT WAS found that THE BOY NOT ONLY REFUSED TO RAPE BUT ALSO CREATED A RUCKUS ABOUT IT.
While after leaked #BoysLockerRoom chats, feminists went all over shouting about India’s rape culture but after the Snapchat details were found, they went silent.
The girl later said she wanted to test the character of the boy.
Now the question is, what character did she want to check? Was it, given a chance, whether the boy would rape her? If so, there can be two reasons behind that – One, she liked the boy and wanted to test his character and if found suitable could express her love for him. A second possibility is, she hated him and wanted to expose him as a potential rapist. There can’t be any third possibility of she being indifferent to the guy and just wanted to check out the rape culture. You don’t really care so much about the persons you are indifferent about. You don’t care if they existed and hence spending time on someone she didn’t care about doesn’t arise.
If we consider the first possibility is right, that is, she liked the guy and wanted to propose him if found suitable, the question comes to mind is, how many couples you know where the woman wanted to test if the guy was a potential rapist? Even specific, when a gal tests if the guy she loves would rape her? No, this can’t happen unless the girl fantasizes about being raped by the guy or is worried about the same?
If you think she was worried, we fail to understand why would she even think that boys in her own circle may be thinking of raping her? …and if she was so insecure in her own group, why didn’t she leave the group immediately?
Now imagine, can a normal person think that a man who likes a girl would want to rape her? This line of thinking showed her crooked mind and debars her to be considered as a juvenile and demands her strict punishment for creating a rape/gangrape narrative. But the Delhi Police did not take any action against her thinking her act was ‘childish’ – which is completely contrary to the level of maturity she showed.
Now to understand whether she was just testing the guy’s character or was fantasizing about being raped, we need to closely look at the chat conversation. It was the girl who was forcing the boy literally to rape/gangrape her even after the boy was refusing the same. ‘Let’s do’, ‘call her’, ‘I will come wherever you say’, ‘and ek do aur boys ko I will call’, ‘we will together gangrape her’ – all these came in a rush without any pause. The boy didn’t reply to any of these and she continued her planning her gangrape. This showed her desperation to be raped and showed rape culture in her. The initial ‘no’ from the boy was enough for her character test.
In this conversation we also find that the boy not only rejected the offer multiple times but also tried to make the other ‘guy’ understand that simply because he could do something easily, he should do it. It was his polite way to reform another ‘kid’ who out of his wild dreams, could have thought about some really ‘nasty’ things. But after ‘his’ proposal of gang rape, the recipient didn’t react harshly in chat but shouted it out and informed the whole world including the girl herself about a potential rapist ‘Siddharth’. This showed that ‘no, boys don’t have that rape culture that feminists talk about’. Upon hearing the ‘news’, the girl however didn’t react much or didn’t tell him in person that she was checking his character as she had ‘feelings’ for him. This further proved that she was happy presenting herself as an object to get raped and wanted the discussion to go on. No, this attitude does not show a simple victim attitude but shows clear ‘rape culture’ in her. She was willingly offering herself to be objectified and wanted the world to discuss that.
Now, if we consider that she wanted to prove him a rapist and ruin his life, which she failed in the chat, she should have still told him not to create a ruckus about it by saying something like ‘women faces such things every day’ (a universal victim card wherever you want). If she had created the ‘drama’, it was more likely action from her.
Since she didn’t do that either, it is more likely that she wanted the world to discuss about her ‘rape’ or in other words she was offering herself as an object of rape to the world. This can’t happen unless she was deeply fantasizing about being raped. …and that is exactly what we call rape culture. When we see that the police didn’t find any problem in that, this just confirms the ‘rape culture’ that is not found as a ‘problem’ by society.
The Fake #MeToo Demon
Another case came up around the same time the #BoisLockerRoom was busted. It was related to a fake #MeToo case where a girl, Bhavleen Kaur went to social media and posted about a two-year-old incident where a boy named Manav Singh had tried to rape her.
Since Manav Singh has committed suicide I have discussed this case in detail here and showed how the complaint itself proved it to be a lie. She has thought about something that didn’t happen to her and hence that can’t be anything other than her fantasy.
What is Rape Culture?
At the outset, we need to understand what we can consider as ‘rape culture’. What we can accept as ‘rape culture’. When we call something as a ‘culture’, that means, in general, everyone in the society is thinking and discussing the same. Feminists say, it is Indian men who show rape culture, and that means as if Indian men are always thinking/discussing/cherishing about raping other girls and in general people of India promote/defend such discussions. It’s something like – in our schools, children are taught how to rape girls, our parents teach their boys how to rape girls, police and law enforcing agencies are promoting such acts etc. Because, Unless, that is happening, we can’t call it as India’s culture or that India has a ‘rape culture’. If none of these is happening, we need to consider ‘rape’ only as a crime, not as a culture.
If we consider the whole #MeToo campaign and the stories discussed above, we have seen how society believed in these stories to be true. There was a time when women have levelled 30/40-year-old #MeToo complaints with no evidence and very often with a very weak storyline. A large part of the society not only believed in those stories but also promoted them. We have also seen those women not getting punished but many men (and now boys) committing suicide due to those unsubstantiated #MeToo stories without being able to make their points heard.
Unsubstantiated doesn’t mean lie, But
Many feminists say that unsubstantiated complaints don’t mean they are lies. Even I believe in the same. But the problem is when such complaints are levelled without any proof, these should be essential without any names, too. If someone wants to add a name to it, they better have enough proof to substantiate, else should face consequences of levelling false charges.
Also, upon simple scrutiny of many such #MeToo complaints we can easily come to know that these are lies. Like I have already shown for many other cases (like Jasleen Kaur, Rohtak Sisters, Bhavleen Kaur, Bangalore Slut-Shaming etc). In none of these cases, however, the girls were punished for levelling false or fabricated complaints. Even Bhavleen Kaur will not be punished. Police have already confirmed that the girl offering herself as rape object will not be punished either.
The problem comes when such unsubstantiated #MeToo complaints prove to be a lie in itself. Like I have shown in the Bhavleen Kaur case. Many other #MeToo cases can also be proved to be lies if scrutinized by sensible MRAs.
Why do girls lie about rape?
It’s not new that girls lie about rape. Everyone knows about it but many people may not accept this. Question is why do girls like Bhavleen lie about being molested or raped. If we look at Bhavleen’s complaint, we will see her boasting about her sexual features and how guys ‘always’ stare at her. Her complaint itself is a desperate attempt to prove self-worth as a woman. It’s like saying – “you know I am so desirable for men”. It is nothing but her desperate attempt to attract all attention to her …and this can’t happen without desperate attention-seeking attitude. They want to be famous among girls and portray “yes, I am most desirable, look at me, look at me”. It’s easy because never-ending victimhood is mixed in these stories. They don’t face any consequences because it’s all their experience.
In the Bhavleen Kaur case, I have already proved that if Bhavleen was not fantasizing about her own rape by Manav, her complaint couldn’t be true. She wanted to promote herself as a sex object. The same is true for the other girl who offered herself as the rape object in the Snapchat conversation. The person who started #MeToo complaint in the world is another example. By a simple look at ‘her’ (?) will clarify that. Women who are not even worth looking at complain of sexual harassment and this can only come from their frustration and attention-seeking attitude. They want attention all the time and do not even bother to level false accusations.
The ‘Rape Culture’ is here to stay
Many women lie about rape after their relationships fail. When that is a common phenomenon and when that behaviour is not punished, they keep imagining ‘rape’ and ‘molestation’ everywhere. In this blog, in other articles, I have already exposed so many such fake molestation and rape complaints. then it is evident that if anything called ‘rape culture’ really existed that in the mind of women and in their fantasy. That is the only ‘rape culture’ that is hailed worldwide. Anything else is just hated and punished.
Now the question is, why do girls fantasize about being raped or sexually harassed? The ‘rape culture’ that we talk about is the discussion and promotion of rape which is socially acceptable. When boys were discussing girls’ sexual features or about having sex with them (remember it was a girl who wanted herself to be raped not a boy), that was considered as ‘rape culture’. But police and the society by large considered that as unacceptable. Even many MRAs were talking against this. So, when something is clearly socially unacceptable that can’t be considered as a culture.
This article is a part of Modern Feminism series. In this series, I discuss different feminist theories and their implications in our life. This series is run in parallel to Vedic India series that tries to understand traditional Indian lifestyle and values. You can
Check out the Modern Feminism series – here
Check out the Vedic India series – here
Whereas when girls imagined themselves as being raped and offered them for rape/gangrape that was not considered as a crime by police and was accepted as a juvenile. That is part of the so-called ‘rape culture’ and without any punishment that is here to stay.