The first casualty of marital rape PIL. It’s just tip of the iceberg. Blaming MRAs will not help. No woman can be trusted now –
Today, I am writing this letter to you in utter disgust and shame because people like you do exist. I see you are promoting all anti-women stuff on your blog which is nothing but pure nonsense. Today, because of your blog my 10-year steady boyfriend left me. He seemed to have read your blog after he came to know about marital rape petition in High Court, and was doing his study on the issue. He came across some of your misogynistic articles on the topic and wanted me to read those, too. When I read them, all of those seemed idiotic and told him the same. After all, how can a woman be raped daily in marriage and still have no recourse? That’s so very oppressive.
In one article, you said feminists (Barkha Dutt) started marital rape debate by saying 70% married women are raped in India, then they reduced it to 30% and then stopped giving any data. This is apparently because all those who supported these statements, you wanted their fathers, brothers, and sons to be castrated first because that 70% would have included them.
I have also observed that in all your rape discussions, you bring examples of Tarun Tejpal and Khurshid Anwar to show the mirror to men who support women. Initially, I didn’t know about Khurshid Anwar so checked and found another article on him on your blog. It seemed to me that he was fighting for justice to Nirbhaya and was falsely accused of rape. But simply because they might be rapists, how could you term other men who support women as rapists? That is so much nonsense. And how is that activism for men’s rights? It is only hypocrisy.
Coming to marital rape debate, you have also shown why foreign media is so interested in this topic. I think they are rightly involved and bothered about this topic as it is barbaric to allow rape within four walls of our house. Tell me, where will these women go? Do they have justice? They are being raped and have nothing to do, no criminal remedy. How shameful is that for a civilized nation like us?
But you regressive MRAs don’t understand this. I discovered now that my ex-boyfriend started following some of you and got terrified about marital rape. He started asking me what he would do if I ever file a marital rape case against him? I tried to assure him in many ways that I won’t, if he trusted me earlier he should have continued to have trust in me. But that trust seemed to have vanished because of you and your MRAs.
I am telling you that you are doing a great disservice to the society. You are taking away our love from us. You are taking away our life from us and you should be heavily punished. Why are you guys afraid of marital rape? If you don’t commit any crime, why are you bothered? Rape is a serious crime, how can you protest against criminalizing the same? I asked the same questions to my boyfriend as well. He told me how would that be proved? I tried to tell him about Nirbhaya, how horrific that was but he got angrier instead. He started fighting with me for comparing him with Nirbhaya rapists. He felt terrible because I considered him as brutal as those criminals. But why he could not imagine the plights of those women who are raped like Nirbhaya in their family. How is that justified?
Today, I understand that all men are real chauvinists. And chauvinists like you are a real problem in spreading this poison in the minds of our lovers. Men are terrified to talk to us, my male friends have distanced with me for no reason. They simply say they don’t have enough time but I see them enjoying among themselves. They don’t even invite us, women.
Today, you MRAs are spreading lies that marital rape can’t be proved in court. Surprisingly, my boyfriend also believed that. He told me it would lead to unnecessary arrest and jail term for normal men whose life will be ruined by this. It is as serious as rape, I am sure courts will have some remedies around that. But that can’t stop us from recognizing a crime, right?
My boyfriend seemed to have countered that as well. He was talking about frivolous 498a litigations. You seemed to have done some study. I didn’t read that but if some other woman is misusing the laws, why should ordinary peace-loving women like us be victimized like this? I wanted to give my everything to him, I had dreamt a good life and family with him, why you guys have broken that dream for me? Why? I ask why? You guys are criminals.
I would have never filed any false case on him as I want a good family but it seemed too difficult for me to convince him. I don’t know what else to say now. I curse you that you guys get destroyed, you have ruined my life. One marital rape PIL in court and my life is destroyed. I just can’t believe this.