Shaadi Ke Side Effects – will you forgive your cheating wife?

Shaadi Ke Side Effects 2

What is the perfect recipe of a happy marriage?

How does anyone know when even Einstein couldn’t figure it out?

We obviously don’t need a brain like Einstein to figure that out as there is no perfect formula for a happy marriage.

This movie tries to bring additional effects of marriage other than what any celibate can dream of. Vidya Balan (Trisha) and Farhan Akhtar (Sid) are the married couple in this movie. They try to bring out new formulas for happy marriage. Even though Sid says this as his funda of happy marriage “When I am at fault I apologize, when my wife is at fault I apologize”. Well this dialogue brings out the eternal truth that everyone knows and jokes about. The husband has to apologize in all situations to keep a marriage going. This is the only reason why for ages men had been apologizing for almost every mistake / nonsense of their wives and that has become a norm in India today.

The situation worsens as they become parents. Sid fails as a father and started envying his relative Ram Kapoor who scores much higher than him as a good father. So eventually Sid turns to Ram for advice on being a successful family man. Ram gives his path breaking tips about happy marriage – “A marriage becomes successful because of its innocent smaller lies”.

He gives Sid tips of staying away from family in the name of work as he does. Ram assures that this action will get Sid the much needed attention from his wife. This idea initially works fine as Sid started getting the attention back but eventually that attracts their neighbour young-star Shekhar to Trisha. Eventually Sid realizes his mistake as Trisha was getting too close to Shekhar and decides to stay with his family and work from his home studio. He divulges his secret to Trisha one day. Trisha becomes outrageous and throws him out of his own home.

Sid stays outside their flat for sometime as all neighbours pitied him and occasionally offered him food. Some children offered their tiffin too. Still he didn’t raise any police complaint against his wife for forcefully throwing him out of his own house. After a few days of torture like this eventually Trisha allowed him in to hear him out when she started throwing up giving a sign of her second pregnancy. Sid was happy this time but then Trisha divulges that the child is from their neighbour Shekhar.

With the news Sid breaks up in himself and takes their daughter and goes out of their home to a hotel. However the child was not ready to sleep without her mother and Sid comes back to Trisha the next day and wanted to patch up. He said – “Let’s forgive each other and start living a life together for the sake of our child, Mili”.

Eventually they patch up and Trisha divulges that the second child is also Sid’s child but she wanted to test whether he would give her a second chance and hence enacted that drama. Towards the end the movie shows Sid becoming a house husband taking care of the child and Trisha becoming a working woman and enjoying her life and staying in hotels away from the family.

Shaadi Ke Side Effects 1

Even though this movie has ingredients to attract audience but some of the messages spread by this movie are quite misandric.

  1. This movie says the truth about husband apologizing to wife for everything going wrong. Even though this was presented in a funny manner but a serious issue of domestic violence against men is thus covered up. The audience do not realize that it is a form of emotional abuse to men.
  2. This movie completely ignores the issue of domestic violence against men by throwing them out of their own home by their wife. It was shown that the no neighbour came forward to help Sid when he was living outside his own flat. Even though this shows the sorry state of affairs of Indian men but it does not send any message to the viewer about the importance of protesting such violence against men.
  3. The most shocking was to show that a husband staying away from his family in a PG or in a hotel as the same level of offense as wife getting pregnant with another man. As this movie shows that when Sid comes to know about Trisha’s pregnancy from their neighbour even though initially he protests and goes out, but eventually he comes back and pardons his wife. This is a very serious observation as these are subtle cues given to the audience that a husband staying outside his family but not for engaging  into any kind of sexual activity with other women but for his own mental peace is equivalent level of cruelty to the wife getting sexually involved with another man. This is how prostitution is brought into our families and movies like this try to justify the same.

This movie presents many dimensions of domestic violence against men but this does not make the audience serious about the same and does not make them realize that domestic violence against men need to be equally punished. Rather by bringing a hilarious touch to the same problem this movie tries to dilute the problem. Adultery is a seriously growing crime in India and many Indian men are forced to take all responsibilities of their wife’s illicit children while the women continues to take all advantages of the adultery laws. However, this movie shamefully tries to justify the same.

***

Related article

  1. Paternity Fraud and related crime to continue in India

  2. Adultery – When you suddenly discover the child is not yours

  3. Adultery – when the choice is between suicide or murder

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16 comments

  1. Farhan Akhtar = India’s Official Mangina Number 1.
    (अर्थात : फ़रहान अख़्तर = भारत का सर्वोच्च चंद्र-चुदामणि.)

    On a more educational and elevating note …
    Bhratrihari quotes on women:

    ‘Remembered she will bring remorse,
    Seen, she makes the mind unclear,
    Touched, she nearly drives one mad,
    Why call such a creature dear?’

    The above is from the author of the original Indian MGTOW text:
    Bhratrihari’s वैराग्य शतकम, translated into English.
    100 verses of renunciation.

    PDF: https://archive.org/details/Vairagya.Satakam.of.Bhartrihari
    Text: http://www.archive.org/stream/vairagyasatakamo025367mbp/vairagyasatakamo025367mbp_djvu.txt

    The biggest side-effect of shaadi, for a man,
    is he finds out that he is treated as shoddy,
    his life is shoddy, his style becomes shoddy,
    and all he can do to stay alive is … noddy.
    Because otherwise, he will soon be a nobody.
    So said Nadia’s Gopal Bhand … after downing toddy!
    Har! Har! Har!

    Like

  2. @ गोपाल भांड

    //On a more educational and elevating note …
    Bhratrihari quotes on women:
    ‘Remembered she will bring remorse,
    Seen, she makes the mind unclear,
    Touched, she nearly drives one mad,
    Why call such a creature dear?//

    There isn’t any need of quoting lines depicted antiquated, foolish ideas from our palaeolithic epics of yore.
    We already know how women were treated in ancient India and the same treatment continues till date,
    I needn’t mention verses from our beloved Ramayana, Manu Smriti and Tulsidas who had the audacity to compare women to animals.

    A quote by Tulsidas:
    ‘Dhol, Ganwar, Shudra, Pashu, Naari, ye sab tadan ke adhikaari’

    Such misogynistic remarks speak volumes about our society and culture.

    Thanks)

    Like

  3. Winds of change are blowing. I would love to share a video of Tanishq ad heralded as a beacon of hope in our feminist circles.

    A MUST WATCH FOR EVERYONE

    Like

    • Feminist love of gold and blood diamonds causes the following
      SHAADI KE SIDE EFFECTS!
      – death of 1000s of underpaid, overworked male workers in Africa and Latin America.
      – keeps companies such as DeBeers in business.
      (Tanishq is an Indian wannabe startup. Progressive? HAH!).
      – the widespread environmental destruction from related mining.
      – the locking up of regenerative economic value into female fetish goods,
      using the ruse of household security. (Truly, it is a house hold-up.)

      The Ad:
      After having birthed a ‘love-child’, the woman realized, she couldn’t ‘do it all’ on her own.
      She found another male mule to ‘shoulder her burden’ ( herself+her child ).
      Supposedly, this is ‘liberating.’

      Note: Widow remarriage is a different matter altogether.
      But that was due to a male reformist humanist … Ishwarchandra Vidyasagar.

      Like

    • This ad shows what feminists really want under women empowerment. This tells us that feminists want prostitution to be in our families, paternity fraud to continue and children to continue to suffer. Men to be more abused and forced to maintain wife’s illicit children and then…thanks Rashmi for showing your true colors

      Like

  4. @ Partha

    Though you may choose to ignore it this time too, but गोपाल भांड just called me, a shrew gone insane, in his comment at the previous post.

    @ गोपाल भांड

    It isn’t shown that the kid is her ‘love-child’ in the ad. She could be from her mother’s previous marriage.
    That’s an assumption you make.
    Even if we assume the girl to be a love-child (which again is a sign of emancipation because it does away with the stigma of being an unwed single mother), what makes you think that the mother doesn’t have enough funds to bring up her kid? Is a unwed mother destined to lead a life aloof of romantic relationships in our society?

    It also brings in a dusky bride as against the biased Indian preference for fair (& hence beautiful) bride.

    Diamonds are adored by feminists and non-feminists alike. BTW, men also use diamonds – ever heard of diamond rings for men?

    Like

    • Character Certificate:
      Khooob-raggedy wrote in about someone else.
      Why do you internalize all this … guilt, Rush-me? Quit already!
      You are okay! Minus the child like qualities in a woman,
      that both fascinate and frustrate a man, you are a unique specimen …
      of our fault-ridden, flaw-driven humanity. We are in this together. ( I won’t marry you.)
      My problem is when you claim, as a specific gendered being, you are special.
      You are no such treasure. But you can be special…
      to your parents, (lawfully married) husband and (lawfully begotten) offsprings.

      Rules:
      1. Children must be born within marriages.
      2. Unwed motherhood / single mothers are anathema, burden, abomination.
      3. Social stigma is the compass that keeps each individual moral and ensures stability.
      4. Stigma don’t just go away. They emanate from durable structure and signify their strength.
      5. Structure requires rights, accountability and responsibility. They deliver justice and resources.
      6. To advocate for ‘doing away’ with stigma, is to argue for laissez faire, no accountability or responsibility. It is a parasitic, impractical, chaotic and selfish paradigm. Eg: Feminazi Reich.

      Diamonds:
      All jewelry is effeminate. Hence the adjective.
      – Women shouldn’t over accessorize.
      – Men shouldn’t wear loud polished chunks of metal and carbon fossil.

      Lastly, roll on.

      Like

  5. @ गोपाल भांड

    A yet another desperate attempt by you to tie a women to the confines of the house and family. A woman is special as an individual and she doesn’t need to be somebody’s daughter, wife or mother to be a accord a place of respect & likeability in the society (with her own family members included in that society)

    You can keep these rules to yourself because if we were to follow such codes of ethics & conduct, women would still be burnt at their dead husbands’ pyre.

    /Unwed motherhood / single mothers are anathema, burden, abomination./

    What do you have to say about unwed men, who father children out of marriage and then, evade their responsibility? Aren’t those men, an abomination?
    It’s easy for such men to take the nearest escape route and vanish into thin air because just because nature gives them an advantage over the women (who have to act as biological carriers of the offspring) but that doesn’t absolve them of accountability.

    Like

  6. Think ten times before you commit to a married life.
    Does the anti male gender biased legal apparatus of India, protect your rights
    as a man?
    as a son?
    as a husband?
    as a father?
    as a retired male mule?

    If not, then know the nature of the coming Feminazism.
    Speaking of the Feminazi Reich:
    “What happened to them?” Ms. Lower asks.
    “The short answer is that most got away with murder.”

    Hitler’s Furies, a book on women, by a woman.
    The review alone, should be sufficient to disabuse men,
    of the hazy foggy mind numbing notions of the flawless female.
    There is none such woman. (Nor men).
    http://www.newrepublic.com/article/115252/hitlers-furies-reviewed-michael-kimmage

    We won’t let it come to this. Rest assured.
    Join the Male Human Rights Movement. MHRM for short.
    Become a Mens Rights Activist. An MRA.
    and go MGTOW.

    Check out:
    http://www.avoiceformen.com
    http://www.antimisandry.com

    Educate yourself. Educate your brother and friends.
    Spread the awareness. One click, one tweet, one post at a time.
    Let the state realize what the loss of male participation, is going to cost it.

    Like

  7. Think she wants to go out for a date with you?
    Wrong! She wants your money.

    This is one constant that is immune to
    SHAADI KE SIDE EFFECTS.
    No cure for it … it’s called greed.
    Brought to you … by feminazism of course.

    See link below for and ask … still trust women?
    Enough to actually get married? Really?
    http://www.whatsyourprice.com/

    Like

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